Long story (kinda) short, The King and I chose to not tell people about our 2 miscarriages. As in, I didn’t even tell my Mom about the second one until after my D&C. My best friends don’t know. Heck, my siblings don’t even know. This became an issue when we found out that I have a genetic disorder that causes miscarriages. That means family members had to be told so they could be tested for this genetic disorder. I assumed that meant my Mom could tell the relatives that needed to know. But that she wouldn’t have to tell them that actual miscarriages were involved.

There are so many reasons why we wanted to keep this private. I guess because The King and I are private people. I didn’t want my friends to threw a pity party for me, all the while telling me about their snotty little kids. I didn’t need sympathy and I didn’t want to relive it all every time I had to talk about it.

Scene: 4th of July at my Grandma’s house this summer. I walked into the front room and heard everyone talking about my miscarriages. And by everyone, I mean my aunts, cousins (and their significant others), grandparents, and anyone else who might have been there. I acted like I didn’t hear anything and just walked out of the room. In shock.

Remember, I had told no one about it.

My Grandma even pulled me into the bathroom to “pick a bone” with me. She was mad at me for not telling her about the miscarriages. She wasn’t telling me how sorry she was that I went through that, or sorry that I felt like I couldn’t trust her with the information. Just mad at me for not telling her. I cried a few tears and left the bathroom. I didn’t say one word to her. Not one.

We haven’t spoken of it again.

Yesterday I e-mailed her a new picture of my twin niece and nephew (who are so cute and who I love with all my heart). This is the response she sent me back:

“I hope and pray that you can soon be sending me pictures of your own precious
darling.”

Is it just me, or is this the buggiest e-mail. EVER.

Maybe I’m just hormonal. Maybe I’m justified. Maybe I’m just overly sensitive to people saying stuff like this. The King reminded me that we aren’t telling anyone about this baby until I am 25 weeks.

Which is going to be hard since I’m about 9.5 weeks and it’s getting harder and harder to hide my belly.