A quick game of “Who’s The Most Romantic Husband?”December 16th, 2005 @ 4:33 pm
Last weekend The King and I went to a lovely Christmas dinner party with about 15 other couples (and far too many of their children, who were not invited, but that’s another post).
The party was hosted by a couple about the age of my parents. They are very lovely people and I enjoy their company. Usually.
After the delicious dinner (and after I totally spilled au jus sauce over me and The King and then swore very loudly about it) they decided to play a “little game” to set the mood for the gift exchange, which was the reason any of us were even there.
The game was a type of Newlywed Game where we had to write answer to questions and our spouse had to try to guess what our answers would be. Questions like; “What was the best anniversary gift your spouse gave you?”, “What do you like to do together for fun?”, “What would your spouse say is your best personality trait?”
Then we took about two hours and went around the room reading what each couple had written down. Basically what it turned into was a game of “Who’s The Most Romantic Husband?” Lots of things like “my husband writes poems for me for our anniversaries” and “my husbands always gives me a rose for every year we have been married.” All of which were followed by all the ladies in the room going “awww…that’s so sweet!”.
And at which point I would gag a little.
You see, I am not a fan of romance. Good thing The King isn’t either. I know a lot of people really love romance. But to me, it has always felt too contrived. It’s like “I know what you want and don’t worry, you’re gonna get it later. Don’t waste your time making me a romantic dinner.”
When it came time for The King and I to read what we had written down, we both had it dead on. We were totally on the same wave length. And I loved it.
The King even choose the same personality trait for me that I had written down. I wrote that he would say he likes my “positive attitude” the best. And he put the exact same thing down. Which is so awesome because I do not have a positive attitude about anything.
We both said that we liked to watch TV together. Someone said how horrible that was and how they needed to teach The King about romance. When in reality, I think that spending time together on the couch is great for us. It doesn’t mean that that’s all we do together. We do lots of things together. We built a freaking house together (and are about to do it again). But they asked what we like to do together. We like to come together at night and watch an episode of “Law and Order”, while we talk about our day. Someone else pointed out that we had just returned from Europe and why didn’t we both say that we liked to travel together.
Because, to me, nothing beats being snuggled down for the night on the couch with The King and Preston. In fact at our house we call this “favorite part”. Because it’s our favorite part of the day.
I tried to explain to everyone at the party that I am not really into romance. The ladies in the room looked at me like I was from another planet. I mean, how could a woman not want flowers for her anniversary? Pa-lease! Give me a Hostess Lemon Pie any day over flowers. And if The King ever were to write me a love poem, he would never hear the end of it. Gag.
Please don’t stone me for admitting I don’t like romance. Women around the world, please don’t roll your eyes at me. Just accept me for who I am.
(and don’t tell me that I’m the only one of us out there!)
Churchy Stuff · I have a slight TV addiction · Me · The First House · The King
Corinne
said,
December 16, 2005 at 6:52 pm
Nope, you’re not alone… I also don’t like sugary sweet crap. I’d rather have something practical… occasionally, and I mean, OCASIONALLY… I’ll get flowers, but they’re not the nice type… just daisies… b/c I like daisies… but other than that, i’d rather just snuggle on the couch w/ my hubby and watch TV anyday…
Shannon
said,
December 16, 2005 at 7:36 pm
There is an awesome song out now called “Better Days” - kind of talks about what you are saying. I agree - conventional romance is contrived. I’ll take my man doing the laundry and kissing me on the neck while I cook mac and cheese over some crazy, contrived, allegedly romantic evening any day. A couple who can be together day-to-day and survive the crap and rejoice at the good stuff, and see the good stuff in the crap and still want to hold hands as they fall asleep is far more authentically romantic than 17 roses on our 17th anniversary or an overpriced dinner or whatever the rest of the world considers “romantic.”
I’m with you!
Shannon
Nancy
said,
December 17, 2005 at 5:09 am
I’m with you, Isabel. I don’t like flowers or candy (though I do like the occasional greeting card.) My idea of romance with my husband? Going to a hockey game together… talking during our commute… watching Lost… talking while we do the dishes. It doesn’t have to be contrived, expensive, or over-the-top sappy. Any real life moment will do!
Avorie
said,
December 17, 2005 at 9:37 am
Haha! We’re not the romantic types either. When we got married, the Rabbi asked us to write letters to eachother which he would read during the cerimony. I am such a private person about such things that I agaonized about it for weeks then write a very short and to the point letter. Thankfully, his was very similar!
Jana
said,
December 17, 2005 at 9:37 am
Amen. I always tell people my future husband will luck out because I don’t really see the point of expensive jewelry that I’d be too scared to wear. Also, I want a ring with something colorful instead of a $10k diamond.
But I won’t tell too many people this so as not to attract cheapskates, hehheh.
"D"
said,
December 18, 2005 at 5:22 pm
Wait, you mean having hubby carry large loads of clean folded laundry up the stairs for me isn’t romantic? Says who? And sitting in our flannels sharing Cherry Garcia in front of CSI is NOT romantic? C’mon! Really!
janet
said,
December 18, 2005 at 6:59 pm
you two are too darn cute for each other. I can totally appreciate the desire to just sit in front of the tv and talk about your day
Rude Cactus
said,
December 19, 2005 at 6:00 am
That’s awesome. There’s nothing wrong with not being romantic. As for situations like that, Beth and I have found it helps to just adopt completely different personalities and toy with people. Try it. It’s fun!
TB
said,
December 19, 2005 at 6:48 am
That part about the “positive attitude” is just awesome.
I have to admit I’m a sucker for sweet talk and fresh flowers are very nice too, but that’s about the extent of it for me.
Elisette
said,
December 19, 2005 at 7:05 am
I like romance, but I don’t like the way it’s required - you must drum up romantic feelings on these days: Birthday, Anniversary… blah blah… I don’t think that’s true romance. True romance is just doing something for the other person because you were thinking about them and they would like it. Sometimes that’s flowers. Sometimes that’s cleaning up the dog puke.
Erika
said,
December 19, 2005 at 7:09 am
You’re not alone…I think it’s great that my husband does chores and pays the mortgage without being asked…now that is SEXY! :o)
I love the “positive attitude” thing…LOL!!
Nap Queen
said,
December 19, 2005 at 10:13 am
I couldn’t agree more. I love sitting on the couch with the hubby, I love it that he scoops the litter and mows the lawn w.out being asked. I hate contrived romantic crap, too. I LOVE greeting cards and little notes left around the house, but that’s about it! Oh, and my husband is a musician, so when he makes up little songs about the dogs and sings to them, I melt
Lisa
said,
December 20, 2005 at 12:29 pm
I am with you girlie.
I used to like that stuff, but over time it changed. I would rather him do something nice for our little guy than have a romantic dinner. (Like take the kid to McDonald’s so that I can get some peace and quiet.) For my birthday I asked him to take our kiddo to the doctor to have his ears checked (cause I HATE taking him to dr appts.) He obliged and I was pretty happy with that.