Why is it that daycares hold such power over us?
Posted by Isabel on August 1st, 2007. Filed under: City Living, My Sweet Babboo.I haven’t even started to type this post and already I feel like I shouldn’t.
But I just got back from BlogHer where we talked about staying true to ourselves. And dude, this is true life.
I got a letter in my mailbox yesterday at Babboo’s school. It was from a parent saying they no longer liked the school and are taking their kids out. The letter was to see if anyone wanted to share a nanny with them.
I was uncomfortable reading this letter. I immediately went to the front desk and asked if they were allowed to do this. The Director just rolled her eyes and told me her last day is next week. Along with multiple other employees.
I just nodded my head, picked up the rest of the items in the mailbox and headed for home.
I got outside and read the other letter that had been in my mailbox. This one was longer and even more vague. Something about Managers and Directors and New Directors and Parents and how nobody was happy and everybody was quitting and isn’t this terrible and how dare they.
Needless to say, none of it made sense to me. I was worried that this was all news to me. News that I didn’t understand. News that I hadn’t been informed about prior to these letters.
Crap. Are we going to have to find a new daycare? Will the costs go up if we keep Babboo in this school? Will he get all new teachers and freak out? Will his friends leave?
Crap.
The King was sent to the school this morning with strict instructions from me to find out as much information as you can! Yes, return and report.
The King dropped off Babboo and started asking the Associate Director what in the heck was going on. She was vauge. She said she couldn’t say. She suggested we contact the head of the Parents Association, because she would be able to tell us more.
And that’s what I just did. I typed up an e-mail and felt like a bad mom the entire time. How do I ask what’s going on without sounding horrible for not knowing all ready what’s going on? This is something I should have known about. This is something that I should have learned about if, you know, I would have attended the monthly meetings (that are held in the middle of the day, thankyouverymuch).
Babboo has been accepted at another school closer to our new house. He can start this fall. The thing is, I like having him in downtown where he is physically close to me during the day. I’ve only gone to see him on my lunch break one or two times in the last year. But I like having the option. And as much as I hate to say this, if something bad did ever happen, I could be by his side in minutes. That alone is very important to me.
I’ve sent the e-mail requesting more information. I’ve asked the questions that I guess I should have asked a long time ago. Hopefully I’ll hear back soon. And when I do, here’s hoping that it will all work out and Babboo can continue to just glide through life without a care in the world.
August 1st, 2007 at 5:51 pm
Oh, man, that is so nerve-wracking. I’ll be thinking of you and praying it gets resolved quickly and easily. Keep us posted!
August 1st, 2007 at 6:04 pm
I wonder if it’s merely a case about a disgruntled parent causing problems. Maybe they made a complaint to your licensing board and the school adminstration can’t discuss it until it is resolved? I hope it’s nothing major but let us know!
August 1st, 2007 at 7:09 pm
I can relate. The school “day care” my kids are in, has had a LOT of turnover from teachers to directors the past year. Only two teachers are the same. I’m not thrilled with the result but unsure what to do. You’ve had more communication from anyone than we have had though. Our people just “disappear.” I do not want to move Eeyore as she went to two home care and one day care before this all before age 2. I cannot move her again. Tigger starts his private school pre-k in the fall so we’re just holding our breath for one more month…
August 1st, 2007 at 9:00 pm
The turnover rate at our daycare is high as well, and nine times out of ten we have no clue that a teacher is leaving or has left until it’s already happened. Not to mention the summer hires that they have that are ‘kids’ themselves.
My kids seem to really enjoy it there, and nothing terrible has ever happened to them while they are in the care of the establishment but sometimes I wonder and feel guilty that I’m not doing my part.
Keep us posted on what happens. I wish you the best!
August 1st, 2007 at 9:41 pm
That sucks that you don’t even know what is going on. Let us all know when you find out. It’s not fair that they are being so vague. I hope everything works out for the best.
Damn that kid is gorgeous!
August 1st, 2007 at 9:48 pm
Yes, I feel your pain. Aspyn went through 6 sitters in 3 years (actually it was 5 in a year and a half, then 1 for the next year and a half). Daycare is the MAJOR reason we took the big jump to me staying home. Starting with each new sitter was so stressful for everyone in our family. It sucked!
Hope it all works out!
August 1st, 2007 at 9:58 pm
is it me or is it beyond crazy that the parents’ association meetings are during the day? huh what?
well, i hope things settle down soon. i understand why you’d want babboo near you during the day, that makes perfect sense. good luck!
August 1st, 2007 at 9:59 pm
When I was in college, being an education major, I worked in several daycares, preschools, and day camps. I worked in various types…from the very swank, very expensive, to the more affordable types housed in churches. They were all the same. There is a huge turnover rate in almost every place I ever worked. It’s amazing how crappy those places treat their employees. Parents pay out the whazzoo for childcare, and the employees have a huge liability, but they get paid peanuts. It’s really a crappy situation. My experience in the childcare world was a huge part of why I got Lila a babysitter instead of sending her to an overpriced daycare..I’ve been on the inside.
August 1st, 2007 at 10:30 pm
This is almost EXACTLY what we’ve been going through during the past 6 months. Except all us parents and the teachers have been very happy–it’s the church that houses Al’s daycare that decided to pull the plug.
No matter what, it sucks. It makes your stomach knot to think about upsetting what has become a very comfy situation. Either way, it sounds like Babboo will be going through a bit of a transition pretty soon–either with a new batch of teachers or a new school. Navigating that part so that he feels secure and with as little upset as possible will be the most important thing.
I think when you investigate further and get some more answers, you’ll definitely know which direction you should go. I’m thinking of you, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned about this whole working mom gig, it’s that things always manage to work out one way or another. Hang in there.
August 1st, 2007 at 11:30 pm
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!
I think it’s just the way it goes in childcare and early childhood education. As you know, my MIL was fired from her job on Friday–from a school she’s worked at for 9 years. And for no good reason, either. We suspect money problems, but still, the real losers here are the children.
I also remember reading Liza’s child care woes when they first had Noah in Montessori?
I don’t have any suggestions. Just a hug for you and your Sweet Babboo.
August 2nd, 2007 at 1:05 am
Number one. I just want to squeeze your little one. He is pretty darn adorable.
Number two. Nothing at all to do with your post. I just wanted you to know that after you wrote your posts about your brother, it really made me think about my relationship with my sister and how much I wanted to just spill it all. It took me a little while, but I wrote pretty much it all out and really feel good to admit how I feel about it. I guess it is easier to admit to people you will never meet that your family has a wacky one.
Anyway, after all that schpeal, thank you for giving me the idea to post about my sister.
August 2nd, 2007 at 1:07 am
We’re moving our pumpkins to a new daycare at the end of next week because of my reduced cash flow and it’s so hard to do. But the new place looks great so I’m feeling a little better about it. Positive vibes your way from our anxious household.
August 2nd, 2007 at 2:38 am
He is so adorable! Hope everything gets sorted out quickly and with no lingering aftertaste.
August 2nd, 2007 at 12:21 pm
It’s such a pain in the butt sometimes. I know the Parent Advisory Council at my kids school well as I am part of it. But they tend to want to take over sometimes.
I hope everything turns out okay.
August 2nd, 2007 at 1:00 pm
cuteeeeeeeeeeeee pic.
Cute babboo!
man too bad abt this day care thing. fingers crossed…it’ll all be k!
August 2nd, 2007 at 1:19 pm
The last paragraph sounds like you already the change in place as he was already accepted at another – so at this point it’s probably moot?
But dang… all the daycare nightmares came rushing back when I read the title of this post. It’s one of the reasons I quit working when we couldn’t afford it to stay home with the kids. Family of five living on $33K. Ouch! But I don’t regret one single moment.
August 2nd, 2007 at 2:33 pm
Child care is one of the more daunting aspects of parenthood, for me. (Well, that, and the whole pushing a living being from my body part.) Good luck figuring out the right school for Babboo.
August 2nd, 2007 at 6:32 pm
Is it ethical to cultivate the daycare workers as occasional babysitters? “Here’s my email address, please contact me about babysitting next month.” That way you might hear more about politics and Babboo has more continuity when people get laid off?
Having the meetings during the day pretty much guarantees that only the richest 10% are running things, doesn’t it? How so very nice for them.
August 2nd, 2007 at 8:03 pm
I don’t think that makes you a bad mom at all! They should be the ones that are informing you, even if you can’t make it to their meetings. I hope all goes well and works out.
August 2nd, 2007 at 11:17 pm
you are hardly a bad mom!
it’s unfortunate they have meetings during the middle of the day, when MOST people work. isn’t that the whole reason why you have him in daycare in the first place?
and it should be quite illegal for other parents to have your info.
all of these reasons are why, i put my oldest in an in-home daycare when i went back to work.
August 3rd, 2007 at 2:01 am
You know I have always thought he was adorable, bu I have to say he is becoming more and more beautiful – in a boy kind of way of course!
August 3rd, 2007 at 2:38 pm
omg his cheeks? squeal.
Sorry for the daycare drama.