Working 9-5, what a way to make a livingAugust 15th, 2007 @ 7:01 am
Like most girls, I had a few years of bad boyfriends. You know the kind, they borrow $20 and never pay you back, or they conveniently forget to bring their wallet when you’re out on a date.
The summer I turned 21 I met Josh. Or rather I was reintroduced to him. We had gone to high school together but had never paid any attention to the other. Mostly because I was a few years younger then he was. In the time since Josh had been in high school he had managed to get married, run away to Iowa with his teenage bride, had a kid, and then got divorced.
He did all of this while I was busy in college and working as a waitress at a truck stop.
(Hey wait, isn’t that a song? I was working as a waitress at a truck stop. Oh, maybe not. Back to my story.)
Josh was on probation, he drove a crappy car, listened to bad music, had horrible friends and wasn’t even good looking. Let’s be honest, if he would have been some hott guy it might have made sense why I was dating him.
I guess I dated him because his family hated me and I had to convince them otherwise. I could never figure out why they hated me. Between the two of us, I was the better person.
Hey, I’m just being honest here.
Josh didn’t have a job. He never had any money, so I’m pretty sure he wasn’t dealing drugs on the side. Josh’s dad owned his own construction company. His parents were wealthy, so he lived with them at their house. He had a roof over his head and food to eat, but no spending money. Hid dad would get him construction jobs here and there. Josh usually only lasted a few days at them.
He would say, “why bother with a job when I do just fine without one?”
As crappy as it sounded, I could totally see his point. While I was getting up and going to my summer job everyday, Josh was sleeping in and roller blading with friends in the afternoon. He didn’t have a schedule he had to adhere to. He did whatever, whenever.
Sure, he never had money. But he didn’t need it. He was being taken care of by his parents. And since they loved his daughter, he could usually get just enough money from his folks if his kid was around.
(I know what you’re thinking, “why didn’t you marry this guy Isabel? He sounds perfect.” Hey, I told you I had some bad boyfriend years.)
Plus it was the summer, so most of our dating activities could take place outside, where life is free.
Josh had it made in the shade.
Eventually Josh and I broke up. I have no idea what ever happened to him. He’s one of the few boyfriends that seemed to have literally fell off the face of the planet.
Sometimes when I’ve had a hard day at work I think about Josh’s and his work ethic. I think about what it must feel like to not have have a job. And more importantly, to be okay with not having a job. What would it feel like to wake up every morning and not have to think about if you have a shirt ironed, or remember where your laptop case is, or what’s going on at your kids daycare.
What if you could just stay home all day and just hang out?
On my way into work this morning I walked by a group of teenagers sleeping at the park. I don’t think these are homeless kids who are down on their luck. I think these kids are simply like Josh. They don’t feel the need to work.
And while my gut reaction is to want to yell out “wake up and get a job, you losers!”, I wonder if maybe they know something that I don’t.
Maybe, with their dirty clothes, messy hair, backpacks and no time schedules, they’re the smart ones.
Back in the Day · City Living · Work
Carrisa
said,
August 15, 2007 at 4:35 pm
No, we’re the smart ones. Money is nice to have. Even if it’s not a lot and it just pays the bills and allows for some lipstick every now and then. It’s nicer than sleeping on the street. Or being broke. Trust me.
And I totally have an ex loser boyfriend that sounds like your Josh. I should blog about him sometime.
heidikins
said,
August 15, 2007 at 4:52 pm
Yes, but sleeping in the park day after day somehow excludes being able to play around on the internet day after day.. and let’s be honest - that’s what 9-5 is really about. ;o)
xox
Abbie
said,
August 15, 2007 at 5:02 pm
Hopefully one day, when I’m happily married I’d be able to share stories like this, look back, point and laugh. As it happens your past is my present.
Frema
said,
August 15, 2007 at 5:09 pm
My first real boyfriend, Nick, got fired from TONS of jobs while we were dating. He finally once admitted to me that he didn’t see the point in working. When you can rip off your mother when you need cash, I suppose gainful employment might be viewed as unnecessary.
And to think I wanted to bear him children. Shudder.
Fraulein N
said,
August 15, 2007 at 6:57 pm
Hee! @ heidikins. Being a bum: I guess it’s a good gig if you can get it, and by “get it” I mean have rich parents who are willing to finance your slacker ass. It’s probably “fun” sleeping in the park when you know you don’t HAVE to.
Cindy
said,
August 15, 2007 at 8:16 pm
I think I may have dated Josh!;)
SJ
said,
August 15, 2007 at 11:18 pm
I always wonder about those people that pan handle money and don’t have jobs. While it might be nice to live a ‘carefree’ life, I can only imagine that it has its downsides to.
Nice thought to ponder….
super des
said,
August 16, 2007 at 1:09 pm
There’s no way I could ever swing that. I always need something to do. I am going crazy in my current state of unemployment. AND I don’t have the luxury of being taken care of by my parents.
But I think I may have dated him too.
Corinne
said,
August 16, 2007 at 2:02 pm
I’ve known kids like that, and they drive me nuts. As to the kids in the park… I totally have a picture of me sitting in that park, taken about 5 or 6 years ago. At least I wasn’t sleeping, I was doing the touristy thing and taking photos.
(BTW, my brother is out there in Seattle now! Living near Univ. of Washington)
Laurel
said,
August 16, 2007 at 2:34 pm
Sounds like one of my past brilliant boyfriend choices, too. I never could believe how his parents indulged him! My parents are very supportive (and generous) with me, but always contingent upon my having a job / paying my own rent / having goals, etc… Seems logical, right?
meritt
said,
August 16, 2007 at 3:26 pm
She was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar…
And I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting that song stuck in my head.
Really. Thank You.
Lizzy
said,
August 16, 2007 at 8:03 pm
This was a great post, Isabel.
[[And thanks for dropping that Human League bomb. Now I can't get it out of my head.]]
Christar
said,
August 16, 2007 at 9:51 pm
Wow, what a winner! Haha. I’ve never had another boyfriend before Shaun, but I did date some awesome losers! The guy I dated before I got with Shaun was a real loser. He dropped out of High School, didn’t have a job, and would date lots of girls at the same time, to buy him stuff. I didn’t know this at the time that we were ‘dating’. He was really coy and charming, yet he was a pig! I eventually found out that he was dating other girls while dating me when he started to date one of my best friends.
I look back at how stupid I was for liking such a creep and shudder!
Audrey
said,
August 16, 2007 at 10:01 pm
I have one spectacularly embarrassing ex who I still cringe to think about how much time i spent with him. So it always makes me feel better to know that pretty much everyone out there has made regrettable dating decisions.
angela
said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:27 am
It sounds nice at first, but I’m sure laying around doing nothing will get really old, really fast. Then you’ll wish you had some money so you could just do something already.
Gwen
said,
August 18, 2007 at 4:22 pm
Your post inspired me. I’m going to write an ode to one of my ex-boyfriends. Hopefully as I write it a moral to the story will emerge, b/c I don’t think there was a moral other than…don’t date guys ten years your senior. Heh.
Anyway, the thing is, I don’t have a 9-5 and haven’t in about 3 years now (and I’m not a trust fund kid, nor am I a layabout, although I do sometimes “lay about”). I moved abroad 3 months after college graduation and started getting creative about income streams. There are a lot of places between “9-5″ and “street living/laying around doing nothing.” If you really want to explore some other options, there are scores of books on the subject, most recently “Refuse to Choose.” Might be worth looking into if you’re seriously wondering about how to transition.
And if the piece was just a retrospective, I appreciate it! I laughed twice (both times at your asides, v. funny). I’ll be reading. Thanks!
metalia
said,
August 19, 2007 at 4:17 am
OMG. This Josh thing? Hello, my little secret twin.