Something I don’t want to pass on to my kid
Posted by Isabel on January 30th, 2008. Filed under: Addictions, My Sweet Babboo, The King.I admit that I have food issues. Issues that, I’m afraid, might rule my life if I let them. My issues go something like this: I see a bag of Baked Lays, I want to eat entire bag of Baked Lays. I see a soda, I want to drink said soda.
The King has his own food issues. They go something like this: eating is a waste of time. Therefore, I will not eat.
Seriously, he says this. And I don’t understand it. Not even for a second.
(Traveling with The King is hard. While I’m taking jaunts around Paris looking for bakeries to eat at, he’s busy walking right past all the bakeries searching for cool graffiti in back alleys.)
I’ve admitted that I come from a big family. And I don’t mean that there are a lot of us. I love them, but they aren’t the poster children for healthy living. (Need proof?) I learned to eat from the best.
The King and I are nervous that we’ll pass our food issues on to our currently super skinny child. I’m afraid that Babboo will be too conscious about food and will choose to stay away from it. The King is nervous that our kid will overeat junk food and have the food addictions that I have.
Unfortunately The King and I are on two completely different sides of this. We aren’t moderate at all. I’m one extreme. He’s the other. How do two completely different food extremist raise a child that is an educated and healthy eater? How do I show Babboo that while it’s okay to have a cookie now and then, it’s not okay to have them for breakfast?
How does The King teach Babboo that eating a couple of cookies a day isn’t going to kill him? How does he show him that dude, you must stop at one or two cookies when he doesn’t eat cookies himself?
Babboo is saying more words by the hour. His latest words all revolve around food. He happily points to the fridge and says “yogurt” and “cookie”, or “cheese”. He wants “candy” and “drink” and “raisins”. It’s all food all the time at The King household. The King and I are both nervous about this. We like to think that he’s just a kid learning how to express his wants and desires and being independent for the first time. We’re not sure this is the care. What if he becomes like us?
We don’t want our child to only be focused on food. We’d like him to wake up in the morning and ask for Snoopy and not food like he’s done the past two mornings.
Good thing I’m pretty sure this is just a phase and he’s just going through some sort of intense growth spurt. Because seriously, this kid is eating us out of house and home.
I know we can’t be the only household with food issues. So tell me, what are your food issues?
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Head over to SeattleMomBlogs to read what I have to say this Wednesday.
January 30th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
I think I”ve stopped doing this for the most part – but I will wake up craving sweet things in the middle of the night. Like Ben and Jerry’s Magic Brownies Ice Cream. Or Americone Dream. It’s bad. Very bad.
January 30th, 2008 at 5:29 pm
Food issues… I has them.
I’m much better now, but I know what you mean… I love food. Food rules. I think about what’s for lunch before I’ve even had breakfast.
If Babboo turns out like you, he’ll be one lucky kid.
January 30th, 2008 at 5:32 pm
I think in my relationship, I’m more like the King, and my husband is like you. Kevin eats weird things to me- like a candy bar when he’s hungry. To me, candy is a treat after a meal.
My BIl once said that I’m the only person he knows who eats only because it’s required. I mean, not right now, because being pregnant, my days revolve around food. My nephew left a cupcake here yesterday- I just ate it! I am not above stealing from a two-year-old, but only when I am carrying spawn.
January 30th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
It is normal for kids to eat you out of house and home when they are growing and then you worry that they will die of anorexia at times because they just pick at their food.
At least that is how it is with my kids. My pediatrician says it’s normal.
It seems to have gotten better as they’ve gotten older, though.
January 30th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Whenever I don’t know what else to do with Sherman, I offer him some Cheerios. Or whole wheat crackers. Or a banana. Or an apple. Or some green juice. Or goldfish crackers. Or a cookie if he will please do all of his sign language for the video camera (SCORE!!!!). Ugh. So I couldn’t describe him as “super skinny”. But his father doesn’t eat vegetables and we’re afraid Sherman will notice soon…
January 30th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I alternate between the extremes. Sometimes, I will see something I want and eat it until it’s ALL GONE. And then look for more. Other times, I don’t think about eating all day until someone reminds me or I start wondering why I feel so listless at 6 pm. Neither of these is especially great for my already poor metabolism. And I wonder why I can’t lose weight?
January 30th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
Hopefully, since Babboo is growing up with both extremes, he will just fall somewhere in the middle and be ‘normal.’ Maybe he’ll pick up some of your habits and some of the King’s habits, and it will all sort of balance out.
January 30th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
Cookies are not acceptable breakfast food? What a mean mom! Kidding.
I have food issues. Several of them. It is a struggle most of the time to try and balance what my body needs, what I can tolerate, limiting what I do eat, and the whole preparation and storage thing. And everyday there seems to be a new study that says sometheing formerly good for you now causes horrific tumors in lab rats.
I think the fact that you are aware of the differences between your and The Kings eating habits and the desire to do what is the best for your child means you are further ahead in the process then you think. More good times with Babboo in the kitchen making pizza is probably a good way to help him learn in a gentle way about food and nutrition.
January 30th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
It’s a fine line. I hate cooking for just two now, because I wind up with more food than I can eat. I try to not abuse takeout or delivery, but some days…. I do buy fruits or vegetables, but if we don’t eat them, I feel guilty about wasting it. There are days I come home and want cookies for dinner, or days I don’t want anything at all. There are days I get the urge to cook something new. Thankfully Maddy is good about trying something new, even if she doesn’t like it. We always have peanut butter as a backup.
January 30th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
You are totally not alone! Zachary has huge, huge food issues, but his are completely opposite of Babboo’s… The kid doesn’t eat anything! It’s so aggravating and scary! He’s been this way since he started transition from the bottle to solids, and it’s something I we all thought he’d outgrow by now, but hasn’t.
I’d make a list of the things he doesn’t eat, but the list of things he does eat is way shorter: Cereal, Pancakes, Chicken Nuggets, Pudding, Cheese, Grapes, Bananas, Peaches, Yogurt, and anything that is candy, cake, chips, or deep fried. Kid doesn’t eat chicken, doesn’t eat beef, doesn’t eat any sort of potatos, besides french fries. Eats very little healthy things. It drives me nuts.
He’ll occasionally eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but it takes some persuasion. Actually, it takes some persuasion to get him to eat ANYTHING except for junk… he’ll eat junk just fine.
January 30th, 2008 at 7:16 pm
I could have written this post myself. My husband will eat ONLY because he has to to survive, while I will eat because I just saw a commercial about food on tv and it made me hungry. My husband is obsessive about NOT eating. He limits himself to one brownie a month. I am not kidding. If someone offers him a brownie he will say “I’m sorry, I can’t. I already had one earlier this month.” I wish I could be more like him! As far as our son goes, I’m going to try my hardest not to pass on my not-so-healthy eating habits and try NOT to let him be as obsessive as my husband. Maybe between the two of us he’ll turn out to be normal. Haha.
January 30th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
First off. LOVE your new design. So pretty pretty.
Secondly…. I feel ya on the food issues. The hubby and I both grew up with mother’s who thought sweets were evil. In fact both tell me regularly that I have too much candy in the house. (Course they both make a beeline for the candy in the first 10 minutes of a visit to our house. And like to scold me AS THEY ARE EATING CANDY!) But the hubby and I were so limited with the candy/soda that we grew into adults obsessed with it.
Now we have candy out. If Seth wants some, he can have apiece but only after he’s eatten something good for him. We don’t really do soda with him but there’s always plenty of yogurt drinks/juice in the fridge. But we’re basically hoping he will grow up with a “whether its there or not there, its no big deal” attitude toward junk food. Is it the right way to handle things? I have no idea.
When you figure out a plan, LET ME KNOW. Cause I’m clueless!
January 30th, 2008 at 7:36 pm
Gosh, Baboo is getting so big. He’s so precious,
January 30th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
I don’t necessarily have food issues to either extreme. I think mostly, we have to let our kids know that we aren’t gonna eat junk food all the time. Kaylie and Haley seem to think that candy is a separate food group and that they must have it each and every day to survive. And Chris is ok with that thought. I am not. And, luckily, we have compromised for the most part about that. Alyssa was becoming a super picky eater, but only while at home. She wouldn’t eat basically anything we put on her tray, except for, fish sticks or french fries or crap like that. We finally put our foot down and either she ate what we were eating or she didn’t eat and it worked. She’s eating healthier now. More veggies. Everyone has food issues, but part of that, I think is that every damn day a new study is shoved in our faces telling us that such and such is bad and such and such is good. I think you just have to learn how to control it. And, since you and The King are both extreme opposites, Babboo will probably find himself right in the middle without your or The King teaching him anything. Does that make sense?
January 30th, 2008 at 8:01 pm
being that im a chef food is a big part of our lives too. i taught my daughter to eat properly by only giving her the same meals that i make for us. no special kid meals and let me tell you, when shes hungry she eats it. as for junk food….i think i scared her about eating too much. i told her that a little is ok but too much and she’ll get holes in her teeth from the sugar. so now when shes eating a treat she’ll say ‘not too much tho i dont want holes in my teeth’. hehe. im lucky tho because she will eat like 2 pieces of fruit a day. has since she was a baby. the only problem i have is that she shkeeves milk. but so do i so i cant blame her. but she’ll have a little chocolate milk from time to time. not too much tho! haha. but my advice is to only keep stuff in the house thats ok for him to have. like if you dont have sugar cereals in the house, then a sugar cereal wont be what he wants. he’ll want the stuff you do have on a regular basis. cheerios, raisin bran etc. in my house a treat is once a day. a couple of cookies or some ice cream isnt the worst thing in the world. they are still kids!! but limiting everything isnt always good cause then junk food becomes forbidden and thats how eating issues happen. ya know what i mean??
January 30th, 2008 at 8:15 pm
Mia talks about food non-stop but rarely actually eats any. I think the trick is to eat the bag of chips when the kid isn’t there to see you, and then let them think you always always always eat an entire apple before you even consider having just one cookie.
January 30th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
I’m the eater in our family too. My husband never wants seconds. He doesn’t understand going to Denny’s after a bar. He’d never EVER consider stopping at Auntie Anne for a pretzel “just because.” He eats half a meal and is full. The word ‘buffet’ makes him cringe. I, on the other hand, love appetizers, can’t see a movie without popcorn, think having a second helping of pasta with just butter and cheese is perfectly natural, and have eaten McDonalds as a SNACK (not in a long time, but I’ve done it!). Luckily, I don’t have much time for temptation nowadays. I’ve always cooked really healthy portion-controlled meals and we almost always eat in.
I think toddlers enjoy food on so many levels and for a variety of reasons that I wouldn’t worry if your kiddo wakes up thinking about food. Just make sure you give him a healthy breakfast and not donuts.
January 30th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
Love baked lays. Particularly the BBQ ones. Mmmmmmm……….
Our kid is screwed because Scotty prefers everything deep fried. Bad, bad Scotty. Me? I’m not going to go into that. Let’s just say I need help.
January 30th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
I worry about this same issue too! I love junk food. My body loves to expand in all ways possible when I eat said junk food – I have to really watch what I eat. My husband eats anything and everything with carless abandon. Our two boys are literally eating us out of house and home. They want everything in sight. We try to keep healthy snacks on hand, with some ‘junk’ mixed in but only for speical occasions, or for re-inforcement of good behavior, or something like that. It’s working, but dude, they still eat non-stop. I think you’ll be okay with Baboo – he’s a growing boy, give him a cookie, or two – just balance that out with some healthy, like an orange!
January 30th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
I have issues with ALL food but try to not even mention them around my two girls. I try to make a sensible meal and serve it at a reasonable time. If you eat, great! If you don’t? i’m not going to send you to your room. Once or twice a week, we’ll have dessert but otherwise, we don’t have sweets around. Namely for my husband’s sake and no potato chips for mine.
Baboo is so cute I could EAT HIM UP ALL MYSELF!!!!
January 30th, 2008 at 10:44 pm
Presently, we’re trying to work on how we talk about food to our baby. She’s just starting solids, so it’s been interesting. We do a lot of “isn’t that yummy?” “would you like some more?” instead of “good job, you ate all your food”. We just want her to enjoy eating what she’s given, rather than needing to eat everything up. I find that’s my issue – if I’ve opened a bag of chips I have to eat the whole thing… not because I love the, but so they don’t go bad. Those 100 calorie packages have saved my life.
January 30th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Wow, we really did write very similar entries today!
It’s tough to know how kids will take things. When KJ was Babboo’s age, I was still very overweight and feeding him things like chicken nuggets and hot dogs on demand. It has been hard for him to make the turnaround since age three, because he’s got that preference for junk. Jack is easier since all he’s ever known is a dieting mother, devouring things like brussel sprouts with the best of us, but he’s paying more attention to his brother as he gets older.
Maybe it’s a good thing that you and the King are at opposite ends of the spectrum. Kevin likes all kinds of foods, but is a HUGE consumer of all kinds of foods. I try to be the grounded one, though I do sometimes cave, and whether or not I want it to be so, I’m fairly obsessed with food – either eating it or not eating it.
I’m going to start saving for my kids’ therapy now.
January 30th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
Food is tasty and good and it nourishes us. It’s supposed to be an important, happy part of our lives! Unfortunately, in America, so many people have “issues.” You love food, but you are physically fit and you eat in moderation. I used to be way more obsessed about food, but I still obsess a bit. Like OPH, sometimes I am thinking about lunch after breakfast. Just today I was driving in to work and I was thinking about how I couldn’t wait to eat lunch. I think you have a healthy outlook…as long as you teach moderation and staying active–I’m not worried about Babboo…he is so perfect!!!!!
I’m worried that my obsession with weight…exercise, etc. will effect my kids one day.
NASTY, my dog just farted.
Anyway….that is all.
January 30th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
I wish I could tell my kids that cookies won’t kill them, but I can’t. Having two diabetic kids makes my whole world REVOLVE around food. Not just food in general, but having to account for every bite of anything they put in their mouths. For them it is an issue of live a long life or die young.
January 31st, 2008 at 1:44 am
You: “Babboo…serious food concerns… worried mommy…blah blah blah”
Me: “how do I steal Babboo for my very own? First…buy ticket to Seattle….”
January 31st, 2008 at 3:12 am
I have nothing wise to say about the food issues, but like HollowSquirrel, I would like to have the kid please. If I send you a self-addressed stamped envelope can I have him PLEASE???? Methinks the hollowsquirrel is being a tad selfish considering that she has 1.85 of her own.
January 31st, 2008 at 5:39 am
I just wanted to say that developmentally, it makes sense that Babboo would be eating a LOT and feeling excited about having the power to SAY what he wants and when he wants it. He is growing so fast! In a few months/years, you’re going to be thinking, “He’s so picky! He barely eats!”
It’s totally normal. Absolutely. As far as keeping him from having food issues, that’s pretty much impossible (he’s going to find the power as a child in saying what he will/won’t eat, etc. and if he knows it pushes the parental buttons, he will feel it’s all the better), but you can help him by showing him what a huge variety of healthy choices there are and introducing him to portion control and EXERCISE. You guys obviously make really healthy choices already (you are always walking! you’re ahead of the game!), and the fact that you are thinking about it at all is great. He’s going to be just fine.
January 31st, 2008 at 8:31 am
We have the same worry – my husband is an overeater and I tend towards the other extreme. Let us all know once you’ve figured out how not to screw up your kid with these issues, ‘kay?
ps your kids rockstar hair is AWESOME
January 31st, 2008 at 2:36 pm
Alas, I have food issues. In my head, stuff like brownies and cake and pie are perfectly suitable breakfast foods. It was no big deal for me to get up in the morning when I was little and a slice of last night’s birthday cake be waiting for me on the table with a huge glass of milk. I do not know why my mother thought this was suitable… I try to do better with Evie but it’s hard to tell her no when I’m shoving a brownie in my face on my way out the door to go to work in the mornings…
January 31st, 2008 at 2:59 pm
Noah has been what daycare describes as “a great eater” for the last few months. I think all this brain development, not to mention running full tilt for 10-12 hours/day makes them hungry.
One thing I think that you and the King are doing a great job at is modeling that everyone doesn’t have to feel exactly the same way about food, or want to eat exactly the same things. He’s sharp — he’s going to figure out that you like potato chips more than Daddy. As long as you guys are mostly providing healthy choices, and I’m sure you are, Babboo is going to be ok.
One thing we’ve done on the cookie front is mostly provide things like fat free fig newtons. Noah is perfectly happy with them when he wants a cookie, and I feel like they’re not too bad for him. Even so, he has sobbed his heart out on several mornings when I have meanly refused to provide cookies for breakfast.
January 31st, 2008 at 3:02 pm
PS, my BFF is just like The King. For years she determined how much protein she needed to have per day to stay healthy and cooked ~4 oz of plain chicken breast in the microwave every day for dinner. YUCK. That there are people who LIKE to cook is just mysterious to her.
January 31st, 2008 at 7:00 pm
My younger brother was a crappy eater for years. Like he used to take his greenbeans and spit them into a napkin so that our parents wouldn’t find out. Then he ended up tiny and hardly ate anything and my mother thought he would never grow. This kid is now 6′3″ and is roughly the size of Michael Strahan. Dude is HUGE. My brother finally ended up going through a growth spurt and started eating my parent’s out of house and home and well…he still does.
So I have no words of advice for you except teach him as best you can now, because at some point there’s school, then college and you probably don’t want a kid who sees a filet of fish or pop tarts as comfort food. That would be me by the way.
February 4th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
i d on’t have any advice to offer, but i’m going to eat up–for lack of a better term–all of the advice that has been listed above.
i don’t have any children, but i think i’m about ready to have some, and then i think about these kinds of things.
and, i know. if everyone waited to procreate until they woke up one day and said: you know what? i feel completely ready and capable to bring a whole nother person onto the planet! well, then we would probably be extinct by now.
but, still.
i get really freaked out.
also, i’ve only been here a few times and right now i’m remembering that you’re in seattle and i want to ask you about this one restaurant but i can’t remember the name at the moment, so i’m going to have to come back.
i hope you don’t mind.
i promise to bring some more run-on sentences with me.