In which I am an idiot. Like this has never happened before.June 13th, 2008 @ 7:01 am
Yesterday, while having a conversation with my coworker, he began to describe a new apartment he was hoping to move in to. He’s quite a bit younger then I am, and far more into having fun then I ever was. Mostly he’s just very likable.
“The best part is that this apartment building has this awesome outdoor patio. And a pool! My apartment would be right above the pool. You know I’m going to be getting my money worth with that.”
Being as we’ve lived in an apartment with a pool, I felt the need to tell my coworker how, sometimes, living above the pool wasn’t such a good thing. I shared stories of drunken neighbors who decided to go swimming at 2am on a Tuesday morning.
He laughed at me as I shared my wisdom. I felt like an old fuddy-dud.
“No really, 2 am is not a good time to be awakened by your neighbors out by the pool!”
“I think I’ll be fine!”
“Yeah, I get it. You’re young and love to be the center of any party. But really, sometimes we all just need our sleep.”
“No really, it will be fine.”
“Just don’t come crying to me when you were up all night listening to someone getting it on in the pool.”
“No really. I’ll manage.”
And that’s when he pointed to his hearing aids to remind me that he’s totally and completely deaf.
“Oh right. Sorry about that.”
Dude, sometimes it hard to be reminded what an idiot you are.
So tell me, please, I’m not the only one to have done something like this. Right?
Apartment Living · I Rock · Work
DomesticatedWhiteTrash
said,
June 13, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Well, I did something similar the other day. My roomate’s mother came by for a visit, with a lovely short new hair cut.
I’m like, “Hey, did you get your hair cut, it looks really good!”
She’s like, “No, it’s uhhh…”
Then, I remembered. She’s going through chemo, as she has cancer. It’s a wig.
Chalk one up in the old “Foot-in-mouth” count.
Rhi
said,
June 13, 2008 at 3:57 pm
I always tend to say something really inappropriate at funerals like this (last summer when it was really hot), “I’m dying of heat stroke!”
It’s really a wonder that I don’t require a helmet.
Audrey
said,
June 13, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I definitely do stuff like that all the time. It’s ridiculous.
Maybe in your case, though, it could be seen as a good thing? People with disabilities don’t like their disability to be their defining characteristic, right? So the fact that you had forgotten about his deafness means that you just think of him as your coworker, not as your deaf coworker. Which I bet he might appreciate.
Isabel: Yeah, that’s what he told me. He said it took it as a compliment.
But still, I felt like an idiot.
Whitney
said,
June 13, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Oh Isabel… Just go read my current post. It’ll make you feel a little better. I do stuff like that all the time. It is a CURSE.
gorillabuns
said,
June 13, 2008 at 4:04 pm
I was going to say exactly what Audrey said. It’s actually a GOOD thing you forgot he’s deaf. You like him for him and not tip-toeing around the subject.
Mrs. Higrens
said,
June 13, 2008 at 4:05 pm
And then there’s bitching about mother’s to the woman who lost her mother to cancer and just had twins (so you know she’s missing her mom); and talking about good times in college to the person who didn’t go. Yeah.
On the other hand, I really like Audrey’s take for this incident.
fairydogmother
said,
June 13, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Sometimes I feel like I’m constantly being reminded of what an idiot I am. Usually it happens before I’m fully caffeinated in the morning, which is nice because then it all just kind of feels like a dream anyway.
My favorite story like this though wasn’t even me, it was a friend of mine. This was a few years ago and she was telling me that one of our grad school classmates, who happens to be a lesbian, was pregnant. My friend’s immediate reaction? Not congratulations, but “was this planned?”. So as she is recounting the story to me of course MY immediate response was “No, she just magically got pregnant! Of course it was planned!”. My friend replied with “Well how was I supposed to know that? She could have gone out one night and had a drunken one-night stand for all I know”.
Um, nice. How about next time someone tells you she is pregnant you just say congratulations?
My Buddy Mimi
said,
June 13, 2008 at 5:48 pm
You are not alone–I worked with someone who was almost completely blind and didn’t realize it. But maybe it made me a little more understanding for those folks that didn’t realize I was pregnant about a week before my due date.
Loralee
said,
June 13, 2008 at 6:22 pm
I had an acquaintance in college who wore hearing aids and I did something very similar. I felt like an ass, but he laughed it off and said that he was flattered that I would forget his disability to that extent and that it made his day.
Kim
said,
June 13, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Oh good lord, if I had a dollar for every time I’m an idiot, I’d be rich. I totally agree with Rhi - I need a helmet.
I also think it’s cool you forgot he was deaf and I bet he’s flattered by it.
Avorie
said,
June 13, 2008 at 7:27 pm
Haha! I have two hearing aids and that totally sounds like a conversation I would have. People often feel so stupid when they realize that I don’t’ sleep with them and therefore can’t hear anything more than about a foot away. But, really I don’t expect them to know.
sizzle
said,
June 13, 2008 at 8:37 pm
I’ve got one for you:
There’s a volunteer here who is in a wheelchair and has some learning disabilities. He and I are buds and we joke around when he comes in once a week. This one day he was saying he wasn’t taking the Access bus and I said, “What are you going to do then? Walk home?”
Um, yeah.
He didn’t seem to catch it but I did immediately. I didn’t mean it like that but guess who heard it? My boss. And later she spread it like wildfire across the office laughing her ass off and threatening to send me to trainings on how to work with people who are differently abled.
Chas
said,
June 13, 2008 at 9:11 pm
At least he didn’t seem offended by it…it might have even made him feel better knowing that you had totally forgotten about his hearing problem.
alyndabear
said,
June 14, 2008 at 10:28 am
Ohhhh, lol, no need to feel stupid. I’m sure it happens all the time!
And I’m with Chas, it shows that his hearing problem is not a noticeable thing for you!
Brittany
said,
June 14, 2008 at 1:37 pm
The other day I took Nicky to the library for Story Time, and no one was in the Story Room. I turned to a lady and asked her if she knew if there would be Story Time today. She completely ignored me. I thought she was rude, and I sorta rolled my eyes at her. A few minutes later, another lady came by and asked THE SAME LADY if Story Time was today. They lady responded back in a manner that informed me that she was deaf. Oops! The reason she understood the other lady was because she made eye contact with her, and she read her lips.
Christar
said,
June 14, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Oh, you’re not alone! I have said some really dumb stuff in my time.
Once, Shaun and I were outside my moms work waiting to pick her up because her car was being worked on. While we were waiting, I saw a blind guy come out of the building. I turned to Shaun and said, “Do you think that they give blind people handicap parking? It must be hard for them to try and find their cars without it.”
Shaun just looked at me like I was an idiot. I didn’t understand why at first, and then I realized…. blind people don’t drive.
Der.
Tracee Sioux
said,
June 15, 2008 at 1:11 am
Honest mistake.
meritt
said,
June 15, 2008 at 1:21 pm
I haven’t time to read the other comments but I’m sure that most of them, like me, thought; “He probably loves you for ‘forgetting’ his disability!” LOL.
Actually - my first thought during this post was “wouldn’t it be funny if he was talking about HER OLD apartment!???”
The Maven
said,
June 15, 2008 at 3:13 pm
This reminds me of something my husband did. We flew to Tacoma for my friend’s wedding. My profoundly deaf friend was marrying a hearing girl. At the reception, they played great music. Lots of Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald, etc. My husband leaned over to me and said, “Is it your friend or his new bride who has such great taste in music?”
I stared at him, unblinking, for several seconds.
His eyes got huge and he realized his mistake.
It happens to the best of us. My friend would have been flattered had y ou made that mistake with him.
Melain
said,
June 16, 2008 at 7:15 am
Oh sure. I’m QUEEN of such stupidity.
I took private voice lessons for 7 years from a woman named Hazel. When I came home from college, I got together with her to catch up and told her how my roommate was black. I mean REALLY black, diluted by nothing. I thought it was so beautiful I sometimes caught myself staring. I told Hazel that living in a little “white bread” community all my life, I don’t think I’d ever actually seen a black person in person before I left home.
Hazel just stared at me for a moment and said, “Is this a joke?” It took me a good 30 seconds of awkward silence before it registered with me: HAZEL IS BLACK.
Ya, I’m sharp as a tack like that.
Christine
said,
June 16, 2008 at 8:53 pm
I’m actually surprised he doesn’t sleep with his hearing aids in. What if there were a siren or fire alarm?
StartsWithAnX
said,
June 16, 2008 at 9:42 pm
It’s kinda like saying “How gay!” to the VP of your company who happens to be gay. Yeah, know what you mean.
Lindsey
said,
June 16, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Christine,
Deaf people often remove their hearing aids at night because they sleep better in silence. Also, most have a vibrating alarm and change their fire alarms to the type that flash. Pretty awesome, the adaptations that can be made.
Courtney
said,
June 17, 2008 at 1:54 am
Doh! Oh well - good blog story.
SJ
said,
June 17, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Oh yes, I’ve done this too but in my case it was involving an illeterate person and books.
D U H.
Carrie
said,
June 19, 2008 at 7:53 pm
I do it all the time. I have a friend who lost his sense of smell after a battle with cancer, and I always forget. Like I’ll say “Dude, do you smell that?!?!” and he’ll sarcastically say “Yep.” Or I’ll tell him to smell a great smelling candle or something. I always feel bad afterwards but he doesn’t seem to mind too much.
Bethiclaus
said,
June 21, 2008 at 2:55 am
Oh my gosh! I’m laughing so hard. I was totally getting ready to commiserate about how I, too, am an old fuddy-duddy who doesn’t want to live near the pool because of the noise. I was totally not expecting that ending. Heh.