In which an innocent night out for sushi ends in me having an affair
Posted by Isabel on July 29th, 2008. Filed under: Gossip, They're just my family.Babboo and I met my older brother Biff for sushi last night. It was a good evening stuffed full of raw fish, seaweed, chopsticks and sticky rice. There was also some good conversation. Although I do admit that most sentences started with me saying “you’ll never believe who I found on facebook” and ended with Biff saying “I don’t remember that person.”
I spent a bit during dinner updating my brother on our recent trip back to Utah to visit the family. Biff hasn’t been back to Utah in probably seven years. In that time a lot has happened.
And by a lot I mean there are like sixteen new Wal-Marts.
And an IKEA.
After dinner we decided to walk off our sushi by walking over to the grocery store. I needed some milk and Biff wasn’t done playing with Babboo. (It must be noted that Babboo has a hard time pronouncing “uncle”. My brother is now referred to as “Awful Biff”. I haven’t tried to correct it. It’s just too funny.) Babboo got a little sucker from the restaurant. He took turns between licking the sucker and dripping the juice all over Awful Biff, who was nice enough to carry Babboo for most of our walk.
We got to the grocery store and I quickly grabbed some milk while Biff got a paper towel and proceeded to clean off all the sticky sucker juice. By the time we got in line to pay for my goods, I was too focused on Babboo and Biff to notice who was in front of us in line.
I was a little shocked to hear someone say “hi” to me in the grocery store. We’re still new to our little neighborhood and I never expect to see anyone I know there. But alas, we were standing in line behind a super cool family from our congregation at church. We started chit-chatting, there in the line at the grocery store, while my milk was rung up and I paid. Somehow the conversation turned to how Babboo had managed to cover my brother in sucker excrement. This was the point when the husband said, with relief in his voice “Oh, this is your brother?!” And then his wife said, “I thought maybe you had a new husband!”
“Oh right, this is my brother Biff.”
This isn’t the first time Biff’s been confused as my boyfriend or husband. My problem is that I’ve always just assumed that people know he’s my older brother. We look like brother and sister. I think we act like brother and sister. It just seems obvious.
Problem is I guess it’s only obvious to me.
We continued laughed about this and the conversation went back to the previous discussion. As we said our good-byes and headed on our way the wife brought up again how confused she had been when she saw Babboo and I with another man.
“Don’t worry. He’s really just my brother. Or maybe I’m just telling you he is.”
Yeah, maybe that last part wasn’t such a good idea. I wonder if this will get back to The King.
July 29th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
We (baby and I) were recently visiting my brother in the hospital. I got mistaken for his wife (he is single) at least a few times a day. It was a little strange. But I’m pretty sure my husband isn’t worried about it.
July 29th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
Heh. Or maybe you’re adding a new twist to the polygamy stereotypes! If Awful Biff (LOVE IT!) moves in next door to you and the King, that family is going to stop speaking to all of you.
Speaking of Awful Biff, I told you about the two girls in Noah’s day care class, right? Angry and Banana, who are known to their parents as Avery and Savannah.
July 29th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
this is great.
what’s Biff upto these days?
ahh church people…all of RS will probably know by next sunday. :/
July 29th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
that sort of thing used to happen to my brother and i when we lived in the same town. i thought that maybe it was over, but it happened again as soon as we entered his work together. although i sport a wedding ring and he doesn’t, his coworker immediately asked, “is this your girlfriend?”
the funniest instance, however, happened when we were in high school. my brother had been hanging out together and a friend of his girlfriend’s spied us. the friend quickly informed my brother’s girlfriend that he had been cheating on her. luckily his girlfriend realized it was me.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:03 pm
Oh yes…. with three brothers I’ve had lots of ‘different husbands’ or ‘boyfriends’ through the years. Crazy thing is one of my brothers and I could almost be twins and we STILL were mistaken for being a couple. Ack.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Hee. Awful Biff.
But, really? Did she think you’d move THAT quickly? I’d like to think you’d at least take a few months to select a new husband.
July 29th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
Yeah! You and Biff hung out! Sounds like it was fun.
Once, one of my coworkers asked me about the girl that was with my husband and me at church the previous Sunday. I had to explain that the girl was my sister-in-law who was married to the guy my coworker *thought* was the Mr. and that the Mr. hadn’t gone to church that day. That’s how rumors get started, for sure!
July 29th, 2008 at 6:17 pm
How funny would it have been if Babboo suddenly looked at Biff and called him daddy!
July 29th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Oh my! I guess people are quick to assume “the worst,” right? I think my first instinct would be that strange new man was a relative or friend! Maybe she’s watching too many soaps?
July 29th, 2008 at 7:43 pm
Don’t feel bad, you could have my situation. My husband and I have been mistaken for siblings on several occasions.
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
July 29th, 2008 at 8:48 pm
Even funnier to me, b/c my husband actually let people believe that his mistress was his sister.
July 29th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
When we were teens, my brother’s friend asked if I was his girlfriend. Now we live far away from each other, but I’m sure it would still happen to us. Gross. I too think we look too much alike to not be related, but people are dumb, you know? Ha ha
I like how you totally fueled the rumors with your little parting comment. You gotta keep things lively for the bored RS ladies!
July 29th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
very excellent. Welcome to the ward