In which I self-medicate
Posted by Isabel on October 21st, 2008. Filed under: Addictions, Me, Old 97's, Rhett Miller, They're just my friends.I haven’t been feeling so good lately. It’s probably a combination of a few different things. You know, things like returning home from our month long vacation, work stress, marriage stress, upcoming holiday stress, church responsibilities, my upcoming (fourth!) colonoscopy, Babboo’s new school…..blah, blah, blah…..
Stop talking Isabel.
Can I be honest here?
Okay, it’s the damn weather. I hate that I haven’t seen the sun in months weeks days. I’m cold all the time. I’m stuck in a office cubicle with horrible florescent lighting. I wake up in the dark and go home in the dark. I’m just feeling myself lately. Add all the other issues on top of my need for a little vitamin D and you get a very unhappy Isabel.
I’ve been dealing with these dreary feelings in the best and only way I know how. I’ve been self medicating.
It seems the only things that keep me going lately are Coke Zero (this stuff is awesome), documenting my daily work attire for the interweb, copious amounts of rice crispy treats, watching season two of “Dexter” on The King’s iPod, and buying new patio furniture at ridiculously low end of season prices at the local outlet mall.
Dreaming of being able to use the new furniture on our new deck NEXT YEAR makes me giddy with anticipation. Of course it’s about 350 days before I’ll get the chance to use them. But still, knowing the sun will shine again helps. A little.
Okay, this only helps a teeny tiny bit. In fact, come to think of it, this actually might be worse. Seeing the patio furniture sitting in our garage just mocking me every time I come home from work is pretty miserable.
Music also seems to be a way for me to self medicate. I was fortunate enough to attend my third Old 97’s concert of the summer the night before we left for our vacation to Europe. Not only was this an Old 97’s concert, but it was a secret concert. They were billed under a secret name and only true fans knew about the show. (True Old 97’s fan = ME!) I went to the concert alone since someone needed to stay home with Babboo. Thankfully I was recognized by a lovely pregnant lady (hi Sarah!) from the internet who so graciously let me hang out with her and her husband for the duration of the show. I eventually decided to forgo trying to get a good picture of Rhett Miller and not just some dude’s head and just enjoy the freakin’ show already.
It may have been over a month ago, but the thought of seeing another Old 97’s show still has me thrilled.
And although my bestest friend May doesn’t know the full extent of my inner dreariness she has helped to make me feel a little bit of sunshine with the thoughtful mix CD she sent me last week. It isn’t just the music on the CD that makes me happy, it’s the fact that I know May loves me and misses me just as much as I miss her. (Curse you Reno, Nevada.)
Although I do have to admit, the music on the “I miss Isabel so I made her a mix” CD is pretty darn awesome. I had forgotten how much I loved Camera Obscure. And I’ve long been a fan of Mates of State since seeing them live a few years ago. I’ve become even more of a fan since I recently found out they have a blog about touring with their two little girls.
So thanks to May for allowing a little bit of musical sunshine to enter into my cubicle each and every day. I don’t think you know how much this means to me.
And don’t worry, appointments have been made with real live doctors and actual medicinal help will be shortly administered to aid in the lack of sunshine in my life. In the mean time I’m going to try to find happiness anyway I can.
So tell me, how do you self-medicate?
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Did you see me over at Alpha Mom this week?! If you missed it head over to read How to Make Dinner with a Toddler Under Foot (in five easy steps).
October 21st, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Mates of State! They were on the TAL Live show, right?
Sadly, my self medication costs many dollars, because it’s usually in the form of jcrew.com.
October 21st, 2008 at 7:05 pm
Like Rhi, I self medicate with shopping. It’s very expensive, but I got a lot for my money because I’m a bargain shopper.
Also? You should make me a mix for this weekend. And I’ll return the favor.
October 21st, 2008 at 7:13 pm
I couldn’t help but notice your stick figure is naked sunbathing on your new patio furniture!
I saw a cool light thing in my Hammacher Schlemmer catalog that you put on your desk and it is supposed to help improve your mood when you are sunlight deprived. Perhaps not as fun as rice krispie treats and Rhett Miller….
http://www.hammacher.com/publish/75946.asp
October 21st, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Glad to see the stick figure is keeping it real with nudity
October 21st, 2008 at 7:54 pm
I have been debbie downer lately too. I have a combination of reasons as to why, but I really think that my medication has been to do something. Just freaking paint something, cook something, walk out of the house and mow the freaking yard. SOMETHING to make me move and do something.
You could also try Fruity Pebble rice krispie treats too. They make me happy.
October 21st, 2008 at 8:15 pm
I’ve never really thought of anything I do as self medicating. I guess if we’re just talking about something that takes my mind off of the crappy stuff in life then I guess my self medication would have to be watching mindless TV and messing around with games on Fac.ebook.
October 21st, 2008 at 10:47 pm
Awww, I’m glad you liked your mix. It’s not nearly as awesome as the one you made me for Mothers Day, but I’m glad it made your day a little better. I wish you lots of sunshine. Go eat some chocolate.
October 22nd, 2008 at 1:54 am
Somehow the day isn’t okay unless I have a pepsi in the morning, it doesn’t matter if I take any real medicine if it isn’t accompanied by a Pepsi. No other sodas or caffeine forms do not work. It has to be pepsi, straight up.
Exercise would be the correct answer though, it always makes me feel better. However, my holes seem to be so deep lately, it is hard to think rationally for long enough to start that process! It just takes so much, sports bra, socks, shoes, comfortable clothing, business for the children… and on and on!
So t.v. substitutes well. It is pretty sad how many entire seasons of shows I have seen lately. Their lives have drama, and if I lose myself in watching them, then I don’t dwell so much on me!
Then there is good old retail therapy, which is why I am really having trouble now, with the economy in the toilet, and things not looking up at least until after the election, and maybe longer, it just is more depressing to go to the store, it isn’t therapy if I don’t get to bring it home!
October 22nd, 2008 at 2:08 am
I eat, sleep, and whine too much when I feel sad. No wonder I am fat and lazy!
Hugs to you and I hope you feel better. You can always gchat with me if you want to talk! xoxo
October 22nd, 2008 at 4:16 am
Are you loving season 2 of Dexter? I thought it was really, really good.
Hope things are going better soon!
October 22nd, 2008 at 5:36 am
I self medicate usually by shopping, which then makes me depressed because I end up spending WAY TOO MUCH money. I listen to music too. I hope you get out of your funk soon – it sucks to be in that state. I’ve been there.
I checked out some of your working closet photos and dude – your hawt! Love your style too….
October 22nd, 2008 at 8:31 pm
I so am right there with you. I have been so down lately. I leave at 5:00 in the morning and get home at 8:00 at night and I am feeling it and getting so depressed about not having a life anymore. I self medicate by shopping, but then I spend money I don’t have and then I am more depressed afterwards. I am just stretching myself so thin to get through school and after doing it for 2 years… it’s starting to take a toll.
Dude, wouldn’t it be nice if I liked down the street? Then we could go out to dinner or something and talk it out and be eachother’s support system.
I hope you feel better. Seriously, I idolize you Isabel. You are super awesome and just rock. Just remember that.
October 23rd, 2008 at 3:56 pm
I self-medicate with booze. I am old-fashioned like that.
October 24th, 2008 at 1:32 am
They say tanning beds really do help with seasonal affect disorder..
I get cranky when it gets ugly too–which just started today. So I ran into a door and slipped in a puddle at the store. Now I am afraid to get out of my chair
October 24th, 2008 at 7:36 pm
Whenever it is cold and the days are short I like to snuggle up at home with a fire roaring in the fireplace, load up on carbs and pumpkiny sweets, watch movies, make jewelry, or read a book. Sort of my hibernation time. Hanging out with friends also helps to keep me happy, having lunch once a week with them or something. When stress gets too high I take time out by relaxing and just not worrying, not doing anything, pampering myself. Just hang in there. Pretty soon the time will change and then there should be some sun in the morning.
October 27th, 2008 at 4:53 am
I think that I have SAD also. I self medicate with food and/or shopping. Bad for the waistline, bad for the wallet – esp. nowadays!
I couldn’t help but notice your real name must start with a J!