Comments on: In which I hope the SAHM’s don’t make me cry next http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/ Sun, 29 Jan 2012 03:48:13 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Frema http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/comment-page-1/#comment-26991 Frema Thu, 06 Nov 2008 02:38:28 +0000 http://www.holaisabel.com/?p=1955#comment-26991 I'm not a SAHM, but I agree with everyone else that this isn't a SAHM problem, it's a woman problem. I think it's also a problem of one side stereotyping the other without knowing the full story. You mention envying those women's nice clothes, but maybe they look at you and envy your ability to take lengthy vacations in another country and live in an apartment while working on a house for as long as you were able to. In this group, it sounds like you might have the same amount of money they do - you just choose to spend it on different things. You all make the decisions you're most comfortable with. But yeah, I wouldn't go back, either. I’m not a SAHM, but I agree with everyone else that this isn’t a SAHM problem, it’s a woman problem. I think it’s also a problem of one side stereotyping the other without knowing the full story. You mention envying those women’s nice clothes, but maybe they look at you and envy your ability to take lengthy vacations in another country and live in an apartment while working on a house for as long as you were able to. In this group, it sounds like you might have the same amount of money they do – you just choose to spend it on different things. You all make the decisions you’re most comfortable with.

But yeah, I wouldn’t go back, either.

]]> By: chris http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/comment-page-1/#comment-26570 chris Tue, 28 Oct 2008 13:26:54 +0000 http://www.holaisabel.com/?p=1955#comment-26570 Yeah it can be, but it depends on your area (and where it applies your ward). We just moved to Wisconsin from Texas. I found way more of that before we moved than I have found here! Not as much as you describe, but some. But in Texas we lived in the suburbs, and here we live in a farm community within commuting distance (it is getting more developed and suburban every year, but still has a pretty rural/relaxed vibe). I can only handle staying home for about a year and then I need to go back to work (I teach, so this works out better than it would in some professions). I think that the problem is that women who stay home don't have a lot of real drama or activity in their lives, other than their kids, so they need to stir some up. Sometimes they do this with lots of activities, sometimes with lots of gossip! Glad you found a way to get through a while at work without the guilt... that is pretty precious (no matter how twisted that sounds). Yeah it can be, but it depends on your area (and where it applies your ward). We just moved to Wisconsin from Texas. I found way more of that before we moved than I have found here! Not as much as you describe, but some. But in Texas we lived in the suburbs, and here we live in a farm community within commuting distance (it is getting more developed and suburban every year, but still has a pretty rural/relaxed vibe).

I can only handle staying home for about a year and then I need to go back to work (I teach, so this works out better than it would in some professions). I think that the problem is that women who stay home don’t have a lot of real drama or activity in their lives, other than their kids, so they need to stir some up. Sometimes they do this with lots of activities, sometimes with lots of gossip!

Glad you found a way to get through a while at work without the guilt… that is pretty precious (no matter how twisted that sounds).

]]> By: Jen http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/comment-page-1/#comment-26553 Jen Tue, 28 Oct 2008 02:47:37 +0000 http://www.holaisabel.com/?p=1955#comment-26553 You should see the moms in the Parent's Club at school! YEESH! Working moms and SAHM's alike! You should see the moms in the Parent’s Club at school! YEESH! Working moms and SAHM’s alike!

]]> By: Whitney http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/comment-page-1/#comment-26552 Whitney Tue, 28 Oct 2008 01:57:48 +0000 http://www.holaisabel.com/?p=1955#comment-26552 It's a woman thing in general. I'm a SAHM and my friends, while not part of a formal group, aren't like this at all. My husband and I are lucky to have friendships based on what we agree on (beliefs, life, etc.), not what we have in common. Of course, a lot of those people are single, but most of them are married with children. It's makes for really sweet friendships! It’s a woman thing in general. I’m a SAHM and my friends, while not part of a formal group, aren’t like this at all. My husband and I are lucky to have friendships based on what we agree on (beliefs, life, etc.), not what we have in common. Of course, a lot of those people are single, but most of them are married with children. It’s makes for really sweet friendships!

]]> By: Kim http://www.holaisabel.com/2008/10/24/in-which-i-hope-the-sahms-dont-make-me-cry-next/comment-page-1/#comment-26550 Kim Mon, 27 Oct 2008 22:21:37 +0000 http://www.holaisabel.com/?p=1955#comment-26550 This behavior would not be enjoyable to anyone. However, I don't think that it is a SAHM thing. It took me a long to realize that I am an adult and can chose who I want to spend time with. Women and men can be inconsiderate, catty and generally unlikable and it is usually due to insecurities. Also, sometimes people have bad days and they don't represent who they are very well. I'd figure out if you gained anything from the experience and if so, great. If not, then move on....I am sure your church other women that are worthy of spending time with. This behavior would not be enjoyable to anyone. However, I don’t think that it is a SAHM thing. It took me a long to realize that I am an adult and can chose who I want to spend time with. Women and men can be inconsiderate, catty and generally unlikable and it is usually due to insecurities. Also, sometimes people have bad days and they don’t represent who they are very well. I’d figure out if you gained anything from the experience and if so, great. If not, then move on….I am sure your church other women that are worthy of spending time with.

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