In which I show you what a moron I am (again)
Posted by Isabel on June 10th, 2009. Filed under: I Rock.Very often I do things that I’m so ashamed about I would never do them in front of someone I know. You know, like pick my nose. Or pull my wedgie out of my butt. Or admit that it’s been three days since I washed my hair. Or that the shirt I’m wearing today was bought second hand and the pants were hand-me-downs.
You know, typical stuff. (I think these things are “typical”. Maybe not.)
(Seriously, today’s outfit, including jewelry and shoes, cost me about $15.00)
So what I’m saying is there are things that are better left un-said about myself. I try to act cool and NOT let others know what a dork I am….
But only in real life.
For some unknown reason I have no problem admitting TO THE ENTIRE INTERWEB that I’m a complete moron.
Behold: 
My diffuser is held on to my blow dryer by painters TAPE.
You see, shortly after I bought my new blow dryer, LAST YEAR, I dropped the diffuser part and it broke off the little pieces that attach the diffuser to the actual blow dryer.
A non-moronic person would simply buy a new diffuser.
I’m not a non-moron. I am a full-moron.
And so I simply used some tape to attach my diffuser to my blow dryer. It has been a year and I’m almost running out of the special painters blue tape. This means I can’t waffle too much between straight and curly hair. The diffuser must either stay on or off.
So tell me, please, that you have something similar in your life. Please.
June 10th, 2009 at 5:05 pm
I love that blue painters tape. Our neighbor uses it to keep his license plate on his truck… but I guess that says more about my neighbor than me. But I do live in one of those neighborhoods. Just on the edge of the ghetto…
June 10th, 2009 at 5:25 pm
I think it’s time to get a new diffuser. Or a second cheap blow dryer. But I think the new diffuser will cost less and take up less room. All for the price of a roll of tape…
you’re so ghetto.
June 10th, 2009 at 5:51 pm
I recently discovered I was wearing a head band the wrong way. A head band. You know, the thing that’s like 3/4 of a circle that goes around your head? Yup. In an effort to retain the modicum of dignity that I have left, I’m not even going to try to explain what I thought was going on. But I’ve been wearing it the wrong way for over a year.
June 10th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
I don’t even own a hair dryer (never have) let alone a diffuser. I know it’s for curly hair, but what does it do? I have curly hair and have shied away from hair dryers because they make my hair too poofy and frizzy- yuck!
June 10th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Mine busted while traveling. It is such that I can still cram it on far enough that it will stay, but I can’t move it about. And I have to press my head up against to keep it there. It still usually pops off.
I may have to try your tape trick…
June 10th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
This is why I love you, I am also a dork. And not washing your hair for three days is COOL. Didn’t you know? It’s better for your hair, better for the environment (OMG, you’re like, so green), and also better for the lazy. LIKE ME! I do wash my bangs every day though, just with soap. How moronic is that? But dude, it totally works. Besides, if your bangs look good, the pony-tail you’ve been sporting for two days looks fine too. Right? RIGHT???
Hmmm, other moronic things I do…. Forget to take my toenail polish off till there’s like 1/8 of new nail “roots” showing. Gross.
Leave the vacuum cleaner in Lil’ May’s room for three days before I actually clean up all the crap on the floor to vacuum. “Just play around it, honey…”
Buy pants at the after-winter clearance sale to make capris for summer (but that’s more cheap & crafty than moronic, right? RIGHT???)
June 10th, 2009 at 9:04 pm
HA! I must be a dork, too, because I’ve used tape on my diffuser as well! My husband made fun of me. And then he asked if it was a megaphone. (In his defense, I guess it does kinda look like it.)
June 11th, 2009 at 2:22 am
Oh yes, I have a many great things that make me a total dork. You’re not alone. My favorite pair of shoes are 3 years old from payless, and very tattered. They have holes in the back on the bottom and my feet get soaked in the rain. So I’m contemplating either taping them or super-gluing them. I just can’t let them go.
June 11th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
I was just thinking that duck tape would probably hold better. That shit holds ANYTHING together. Hello, people use it on their cars!
June 11th, 2009 at 1:27 pm
We don’t have painter’s tape, but I use duct tape. On EVERYTHING.
June 11th, 2009 at 4:05 pm
I don’t know what the diffuser is for. Or where my hair dryer is. Not that I would use it, as I think it would blow a fuse. I hate renting.
Also? While Jill was out of town, I was lucky to wash my hair 2x/week. My big toes are still sporting the remnants of my January pedicure, although that will change this weekend. But only because of this: http://www.lizawashere.com/2009/06/pedicure-weekend.html (not what you think). What else?
Oh! I know! My cleavage is currently being kept to myself with an earring because I couldn’t even find a safety pin to hold the too-low cut but good for pumping at work dress together this morning.
June 11th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Oh gosh – I’ve got duct tape on my car as of right now. I don’t just live on the edge of the ghetto I am the ghetto.
June 12th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
The only thing I can think of is my “blankie.” I know, I’m a grownup. The blankie is so torn and raggy that it is actually a choking hazard. I once got my let stuck in it and thought we’d have to amputate. I keep in it a pillowcase, and when I need it I pull a corner out and sleep with it. My husband calls it stinky because it can’t be washed anymore. (Yes, I’m 26 years old.)
June 15th, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Oh bless your heart!
Totally off-topic here but the little white jar with the blue flowers in the background is totally cute! And matches the tape!