hola, isabel

As stated previously, Babboo is the owner of one female pirate. Her name is Garbiella. Her hair is cut in a sassy bob, she wears purple boots and a yellow tunic. She also came in a set that included a prison guard, a few mice, and a pile of hay to sit on.

But that’s not all. Gabriella also came with her own bowl, water bucket, spoon and fork. But that’s not all. She also came with a chain that goes around her neck.

A CHAIN THAT GOES AROUND HER NECK!

What kind of a message is this sending to my sweet and innocent son? Babboo’s going to grow up thinking that men rule over well groomed women with a huge ax and a neck chain.

A NECK CHAIN.

(While researching this product I found that it’s actually an imprisoned prince. But dude, did you see his hair? This is no “prince”. Gabrielle is a girl and has purple boots to prove it.)

Since last week’s post about Babboo’s pirate* family he’s added four new pirates. FOUR in one week. (It’s a good thing that Target sells them for about $1 a piece.) When I asked Babboo some of the new pirates names he was all “Mr. Spiderman” and “Mr. Batman”. I reminded him that he ALREADY has pirates with those names.

And so, dear interweb, I’m asking for your help in coming up with some names for the rest of his collection.

(Upon looking at this picture I took last week I am reminded that none of his four new pirates are actually in this picture. Oy vey.)

Let’s start small and only name 7 of them. For ease and convince I’ve numbered them. All you need to do is submit your suggested name and the corresponding number. Oh yes, it’s just that easy.

To aid in your creative process, I’ll give you details.

This is Pirate #1. As you can tell by his white hair, he’s a little older. He’s been a solider since he was 17. #1 likes cheeseburgers, fast women and fast cars. He thinks he’s most sexy while wearing his uniform, so he never takes it off.

Pirate #2 is someone that might be a little familiar to you. (Does the name “Gabriella” mean anything to you?) He’s works at night as a prison guard and during the day he’s working on his cosmetology degree. One of his female prisoners is kind enough to let him practice cuts and styles on her. Pirate #2 is very good at bobs and finger waves.

Next up, Pirate #3. He has red hair, a red beard and can always be recognized the the yellow feather in his pirate hat and the silver skull he wears around his neck. He never leaves the house without his shield to ward off the ladies.

(insert #3)

Even though he’s known as Pirate #4, he’s never actually set foot on a ship. He’s a land-lubber through and through. He wears his hair long and his pants tight. He is a little bit of a germophobe so her rarely takes off his gloves.

Pirate #5 is the playa of the ship. He wears an eye patch, but his eye is just fine. He heard that women like a man with an eye patch since it makes them look tougher. He also heard that woman like a hairy chest. (Apparently #5 thinks it’s 1972 and that life is a bad porno movie.) (I mean, seriously, check out his feathered hat, full beard, and striped pants.)

English is Pirate #6 second language. He mainly expresses his feelings with grunt and hand signs. He doesn’t understand much English either. So while his boat mates keep telling him that a fur wrap and purple pants don’t really go together, he keeps trying to pull off the look.

Once they can convince him to give up the fur they’ll tackle the horned hat and cuffs. Some thing just take a little more time.

You can’t tell by the picture but Pirate #7 has a pony tail that goes down his back. He’s likes to keep it pulled back so it won’t get in the way when he does his high ninja kicks or when throwing his ninja stars. He’s also a little bit of a pyromaniac. (Good thing he doesn’t use a lot of hair spray.)

Pirate #8 holds a special place in my heart. You see, he was the first one we ever bought. We got him at KaDeWe in Berlin last summer. I think I was drawn to his gold hoops and gold belt. Plus, check out his Mr. T chain and yellow shoulder pads. I also am a sucker for a man with a little stubble.

Okay internet, you’ve got a lot to work with here and only eight names to come up with. While I’d like to say that the most clever names will be chosen, I can’t promise anything. I’m going to let Babboo chose his faves. And, let me tell you, he doesn’t appreciate cleverness like I do.

On a completely different note, want to know what the other pirates were during while I was taking pictures of Pirates #1- #8? They were attending The Wedding of the Century between Isabel and The King (their real names). The Sexy Pirate and Diver Pirate were in attendance, as well as Girl Pirate and some dude with a red cape.

And again, on a completely different note, check out the corner of Babboo’s room. He insists on saving every single box his pirates hjave come in, as well as every catalog insert included in the box.

Dude, that’s a lot of boxes.

*we use the term “pirate” lightly at our house. Pretty much any Playmobil guy or girl is a considered a “pirate”.