I have quite a few things on my mind today. Hence the bullets:

• Babboo woke up on Friday covered in red spots. I’m no expert, but I was pretty sure it wasn’t a good thing. A trip to the doctor on Saturday (they weren’t as freaked out about it as I was) proved futile as the doctor was unable to tell us what was causing it.
• Thankfully, the spots are going away. Babboo is back at school today. And I’m back at work.
• Since we were stuck home with a sick baby yesterday, we decided to watch The Pursuit of Happyness on pay-per-view. The movie is 118 minutes long. The first 113 minutes are the most depressing 113 minutes I’ve ever lived through.
• The last 5 minutes of the movie were very uplifting and heart-warming. I can’t seem to decide if those 5 minutes makes up for the crappy 113 minutes. Thoughts?
• The King isn’t really funny ha-ha. I’ve just noticed this about him. I can’t seem to remember if he used to be funny ha-ha, or if this is a new thing.
• We’re trying to bring the funny back into our relationship.
• The King bought one of those 100 packs of condoms off the interweb yesterday. He thinks we should start a new blog documenting their usage.
• He also thinks we should try to use all 100 condoms in 100 days.
• We aren’t going to be doing either of those things.
• But I think it’s funny that he suggested that.
• I hate going for leisurely drives. Hate. So much. I feel like I’m stuck in a jail cell with no hopes of ever being set free.
• I can’t find my Pilates DVD. I think the universe wants me to be chubby for BlogHer.
• Babboo is sleeping in the front room (in a movable crib) and we are sleeping in our bed. It’s been working out gloriously.
• I have an idea for a fun post this week. But it requires me taking pictures of stuff at home. The new camera is working out great for me.
• You know how I mentioned we were stuck in the house all day yesterday? It gave me some time to try this out. It took me about 10 minutes to do. The King loved it. I felt a little self-conscience. I will have to play around with it more before I wear it that way in public.

So tell me, what’s on your mind today?

• Since we don’t have a grocery store to go to in downtown Seattle, I’ve been ordering our groceries online. This works great. Except for last week when I ordered enough groceries to make 4 different dinners for us. One ingredient for each of the dinners didn’t come. So I have a yummy spaghetti recipe to make, but no speghetti. And a tomato risotto, but no tomatoes. And what’s the point of a calzone if you don’t have olives?!
• I went to a baby shower on Saturday for a friend who is having her 3rd baby girl. I bought the baby lots of black shirts in all different sizes. Screw pink, a girl needs some black in her life. My best friend May made some awesome Battlestar Galactica onesies for her. Something about Save the Cylones. I don’t watch the show, but the mom loves the onesies. I may have heard mention of “baby best shower gift ever!”
• The King and I had our first night away from our Sweet Babboo on Friday night. More about that over at my other blog.
• I found a really creepy card at Hallmark last week. It said something like “I miss you so much. Please mail me a lock of your hair”. Then you open it and it said, “with your head attached”. Of course I bought it and mailed it to a friend that’s going through a really tough time right now. She thought it was equally creepy. I hope she understood it was a joke. If not, maybe we shouldn’t be friends.
• I have recently realized that Babboo has never played in grass. In fact, I’m not sure that he’s been within 5 feet of grass. This is urban living at its best. Maybe (when it stops raining) we’ll take the kid over to a park. Or just a friends house. I feel a little guilty about this. And I’m not sure why.
• I am sick of the rain. I am ready to see the sun.
• The King and I are trying to get some vacations for the year planned out. We want to go to a beach, but aren’t sure about taking the baby there. We can handle the heat. But can he?? Is there a cool beach area in America that we should look into, like North Carolina or Florida? Or should we just go to Mexico? Or Vegas?
• I will stop with the bullets already.

Welcome to Wednesday morning. Here are a few things on my mind this morning:

• We don’t live near a grocery store. Plus I never have a car to drive to the grocery store. Thus me doing my grocery shopping online. $7.95 is a small price to pay for grocery delivery, no? Unfortunately, it takes about an hour to do my shopping online. Not including the time it takes to pull Babboo away from the computer wires.
• I don’t know what happens in downtown Seattle while I’m in bed asleep, but it always looks like a mess in the morning; garbage everywhere, the smell of urine, even condom wrappers.
• Are you reading Frema’s online soap opera yet? If not, you are dead to me.
• I’m not sure what they are feeding Babboo at school, but the kid poops his pants all day long. If I change a diaper, there is a 94% chance that it will contain dookie.
• The King and I have been trying to talk people into watching the new show Rules of Engagement. We’ve really been liking it lately. But this week’s episode sucked donkey ass. So um, if you watched it this week because I suggested it, I’m sorry.
• The King and I are still sleeping in the front room. I don’t dare move back into the bedroom until Babboo has slept through the night for a few nights in a row. That has yet to happen, damn it.
• It was 70 degrees here in Seattle last week. Today I just about froze on my way into work.
• I miss the sun and have almost given up hope that I will ever see it again.
• The King was in LA for five days last week for work. Including the weekend. Again, I have a new found respect for single moms. It’s a lot of work to take care of a kid alone.
• What did we do while The King was gone? Babboo and I put on our blazers and took pictures of us together. Fun times. We’re glad The King’s back home.

• A bunch of people I know, including myself, saw the movie The Holiday this weekend. Did you see it? What did you think about it? Because basically I thought it was horrible. Jude Law is unbelievably hot, but the movie was still horrible.

• I won a Whoorlie award today. It’s my first ever blog award, and I’m thrilled. Awesome, I know. It would be funnier if it was a “Whore-lie” award for being such a whore. But truthfully, I’m glad it isn’t an award for being a whore. Which, for the record, I am not.
• I’m really looking forward to this weekend. More specifically Friday night. I’ll report more on that next week.

So tell me, what’s on your mind today?

I got to work this morning and began my usual routine:

• take off my coat and get my laptop out of my backpack
• turn laptop on
• while laptop is “warming up” go into the office kitchen
• make a cup of hot chocolate
• make a bowl of instant oatmeal
• fill up my water bottle
• come back to my desk and open the internet
• begin reading (personal) e-mails
• respond to (personal) e-mails

It’s the same thing everyday. And it’s very exciting.

NOT.

(Love the 90’s reference there!)

Today was a little different. While typing out an e-mail to TVGoddess I heard a very loud fart. So loud that there was no denying what it was.

But where did it come from?

The 70+ year old guy that sits in the office near me.

I had to just keep typing and act like I didn’t hear anything. But I know that he knows that I heard it. I mean, there’s no way I couldn’t have.

Praise the Lord, it’s Friday. Things I’m looking forward to:

• Finding out the winner of the donuts from last week’s King Friday. (Why wasn’t I in the running? Mommy needs some donuts.)
• Cleaning my bathroom tonight.
• Seeing my cousin and his lady-friend, who are flying in from Mesa today.
• Starting work on the Christmas presents my friend May and I just came up with. (They are going to be legendary.)
• The King’s broken rib healing. The poor guy is in some serious pain and the broken rib doesn’t help with the house building project.
• Trying to get a good picture of Babboo to use in our Christmas card.
• Sleeping in tomorrow.

Before I bore you to death with more bullets, let’s see what The King has to say.

————————-
ok, when i said embarassing, i didn’t mean stuff that you needed therapy for. i was thinking stuff like, “i shave my pubic hair into an arrow pointing to my goodies” or ” i sneak into my bosses office and squeeze out a fart when he/she isn’t in the room”. i tell you what, i don’t judge. and i know it was hard to open up for some of you. so thanks for giving us all a laugh. its a tough pick. i’d have to say that not washing one’s hands after going #’s 1 or 2 is pretty out there, but its probably not safe to eat doughnuts (or anything) without a good wash. i hope you dont work in a restaurant. and even though i pretty much spent all week thinking of MK eating doughnuts in bed with no undies on, you cant win 2 weeks in a row. but thanks though. it warms my heart to know that there is at least one other person out there fighting the war against unnecessary underclothing. live free sister! bump it up a notch and stop wearing them during the day too… in fact, let’s all follow MK and make this friday, 11/17/06, sleep nude day. please join us as we all lay ourselves between the sheets, sans clothing (or at least underwear) and sleep unbound by society’s pressures and the itchy elastic. pledge your support.

so i guess this week we have two winners. i only have one doughnut card, so that goes to janet for being the first to admit that she has a blanky. i know there were several of you that came forward in that department, but being first is always the toughest. and second prize goes to jen, the finger picker. i have something special for you. send us your mailing addresses and we’ll get things in the mail. (MK, your prize from last week is still to come. we head to the great white north next week.)

so i never really planned for my weekly post to become a contest, but it seems to be the best thing so far since my mundane existence leaves very little interesting to write about. plus, i want everyone to have a chance to revel in their good fortune and win a fantastic prize. this week’s winner will win an all expenses paid, one year subscription to their choice of the following magazines: glamour, self, or successful farming.

to win this week’s coveted prize, you must answer the following:

if you could impart just one piece of wisdom that you have learned in life, what would it be? the king’s wisdom is this: baby wipes aren’t just for babies. why use dry toilet paper when a sanitary baby wipe will give you a far superior result. underneath this tough exterior is a guy who likes to have that gentle yet thorough post-toilet cleansing that only a baby wipe can provide.

i’m just sayin’, that’s how i roll.

best wisdom wins. oh, and put an extra blanket on tonight if you’re in a colder climate…
-k

You know how when you have this horrible weekend filled with no sleep and fussy babies, and then come Monday morning you’re excited to come back to work? But then come Tuesday (which just so happens to also be today) you’re sick of work again. And tired from the aforementioned no sleep weekend.

Yeah-that’s what happened to me.

Which means today is all about the bullets.

• The rain is killing me. I know it rains in Seattle. But this is crazy. The King went to the new house yesterday just to make sure it hadn’t floated away. Seriously.

• I’m loving my new rain-proof jacket. And although it’s hideous-it totally works. (Plus it was free, thanks to my best friends husband that works in the clothing industry.)

• Babboo has decided he hates the boob. And not just the boob, but anything that comes out of the boob. So I’ve been pumping. Which I hate.

• Last night The King broke down and told me that Babboo’s school recently informed him that Babboo won’t take breast milk from the bottle. AT ALL!

• Apparently they’ve been mixing the milk I take them with cereal and feeding it to him that way. And then giving him formula in his bottle.

• WHAT? How long has this been going on? You mean to tell me that I’ve been killing myself with this damn pump and Babboo doesn’t even appreciate it?

• I think this means I need to stop pumping.

• I’m not sure how I feel about this.

• Babboo and I rode the bus down to my best girlfriend’s house last night. Damn the Seahawks games and messing with the bus schedule. Waiting for the bus in the rain while you have a baby strapped to your body is not fun.

• Hanging out with the friends was fun.

• I think I’m meeting my cousin for lunch today. She’s coming into the city to try to get on at a fancy salon. (remember she just graduated from beauty school?) How awesome would it be if she was working 2 blocks away from me? We could do lunch all the time. And she could do my hair. It’s a win/win situation.

• I have to attend a meeting tonight for a Church organization that I belong to. I’m trying really hard to not call it a STUPID MEETING. Because basically, that’s what it is. (Breath, breath, breath…)

• Janet and Andrew are getting married this weekend. I’m very excited for both of them. Very excited!

• I can’t wait for the end of the horrible nasty election commercials. And the phone calls. Why do they have to be so mean? And confusing.

That is all for now. Thank goodness.